Adultery has become so rampant that even before the divorce is over the “remarriage” is underway. Not too many people question the ability for people to just get divorced and remarry. But what is even worse is that if two people decided they no longer want to be married, then they have full rights to have relations with anybody they want even before the divorce has taken place, let alone the annulment process started.

     When couples get married, it is a life-long commitment. This commitment is also exclusively for one person for that lifetime. It is not a commitment for one person at one time, but for one person their entire life. The promise was to each other, but it was also to God. When a couple gets married they promise to God and each other to be faithful to each other for life. God created the husband for his wife and the wife for her husband. They are made for each other to help each other get to heaven.

              Pre-nuptial agreements are out of the question. It presumes divorce. It is like making an agreement while knowing that nobody will fulfill the agreement. It does not make sense. It goes against the nature of an agreement. If two business people signed a contract with that in mind, why bother? You know the other is lying to you and you are lying to them. The couple seem to get married just so they think they can have relations without feeling bad about it. What they don’t see is that the marriage becomes just a contract of mutual use. They treat each other as objects for their own gain or pleasure. This is not love, it is lust. Using each other in this way trains each other to be unfaithful.

Couples should not have the mindset of having a divorce if things go bad. How committed can a person be with that thought in the back of their minds? It is a sign of deeper trouble from the outset of the marriage. Trust is a major issue for many of these couples. But if you cannot trust, where is the relationship? Fear can then control everything. Is this love? It would be very difficult to remain faithful if the trust is not there. Many of the marriages end in self-fulfilling prophecy because of these mindsets.

Many marriages end after a real earnest try to make things work. These couples put all their effort into keeping the marriage, but for one reason or another divorce happens. It is painful for everybody. But the Church offers help and healing for those who suffer from divorce. Divorce in itself is not so much the sin as what the couples do to get there. Couples are not excommunicated simply because they are divorced. But if they get “re-married” (without an annulment), then they would be committing adultery because they have already given themselves in marriage. God always offers ways to be reconciled to Him. Ask your priest what can be done if you are in this situation.